Monday November 3^rd

8:20PM

Dear Diary,

It’s finally here. The day I’ve been waiting for, all these long 72 years. Everything set for tomorrow. Caribou Barbie Governor Palin, following embarrassing Sarkozy prank call incident, voluntarily walked back into holding cell and handed over keys (in her defense, she’s probably never heard French accent before. Easy mistake). Even snuck in 11^th hour Monday/Saturday Night Live appearance for self and Gov. Palin, as it seems American People like me far better when making fun of self than when discussing anything remotely relevant to actual campaign.

Now Iâ??ll admit, polls arenâ??t exactly screaming McCain domination, but there are certainly still ways this old Maverick could get that ninth inning walk-off home run. Current idea is to keep youth from voting by paying Comedy Central to run all-day-no-commercial-breaks Colbert Report/Daily Show election special, as younguns would be too enthralled in absorbing every witty Stewart and Colbert quip to bother leaving sofa to vote. Ran idea by Rick, but he says only Mr. Needs-To-Do-Some-Squats has that kind of money to throw around on TV spots. Hmmmm. Youâ??d think marrying beer heiress would come with more perksâ?¦

Anyway like I said, all set for election day tomorrow, biggest day of my life. Only problem is, have been secretly informed that I myself have indeed already voted, and for Barack Obama . Must have been another Ambien sleepwalking episode. Hope this doesnâ??t come back to haunt meâ?¦

Maverick, over and out

John